if i ever get married...

... this will be my wedding song. :)






Valentine by Kina Grannis


Love, it's a special day.
We should celebrate,
And appreciate,
That you and me, found something pretty neat,
And i know some say this day is arbitrary...

But it's a good excuse to put our love to use,
Baby I know what to do, 
Baby I will love you,
I'll love you, I'll love you.

Love, I don't need those things,
I don't need no ring,
I don't need anything,
But you with me, cause in your company, 
I feel happy, 
Oh so happy and complete

And it's a good excuse to put our love to use
Baby I know what to do, 
Baby I will love you,
I'll love you, I'll love you.

So won't you be my honey bee,
Giving me kisses all the time?
Be mine, 
Be my valentine...

So won't you be my honey bee,
Giving sweet kisses all the time?
Be mine, be my valentine...




So sweeeet! :)


Normal and proper posts back soon! Have a lovely weekend!

xx.

HACKER.

instead of spending this time doing some useful studying, i'm spending it trying to get around the firewalls imposed upon the internet at uni so that i can download torrents. =="

update: can't get it working... has now downloaded all these random programs. wondering whether or not to uninstall everything...

underwater

I'm a car crash but I have to get up and every morning is a clean up.




- Underwater, Tegan and Sara

why would you dump Carey Mulligan?

stupid Shia LeBeouf. fool. she's adorable!

i think she's so prettyyyy! definitely my favourite actress at the moment. :)

Hi all!

it's 11:35pm on a Sunday night. I should've really gotten started on seriously studying some Pharmacology but I just can't bring myself to. Sure, I've flicked through some of the notes but I haven't sat down and really gone through the material as yet. I'm making wonderful progress on Biotechnology though. I really do love the subject so much! I had a look at it's timetable for next year. It's really unfortunate that they've gone and scheduled its weekly 2-hour lecture from 5-7pm; no one will want to do the subject. It's such a shame... It's a wonderful subject!

I'm in the process of finalising what subjects to do next year. I think I'm going to major in Biomedical Biotechnology with a specialisation in Pharmacology. I'm going to do second year Pathology and third year Molecular Plant Biology as well. I'm not yet completely settled on that second one but it appeals to me the most out of all my options and it will compliment biotech really well.

I think I'm starting to feel stressed about my final assessments. I think that's a good thing, really. It should motivate me to actually make an effort and do well. I'm yet to start on my Politics essay but I hopefully will sometime this week. It's 2000 words so it shouldn't be too bad.

I'm having a sad day today. Not quite sure why. But you know when you have those days where you just feel sad and tired?

I feel a bit lost in my own world.

xx.

Men.

I came across this on a friend of a friend's page and found it rather funny:




Men.


The nice men are ugly.


The handsome men are not nice.


The handsome and nice men are gay.


The handsome, nice and heterosexual men are married.


The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men, have no money.


The men who are not so handsome, but are nice men with money think we are only after their money.


The handsome men without money are after our money.


The handsome men, who are not so nice and somewhat heterosexual, don't think we are beautiful enough.


The men who think we are beautiful, that are heterosexual, somewhat nice and have money, are cowards.


The men who are somewhat handsome, somewhat nice and have some money and thank God are heterosexual, are shy and never make the first move.


The men who never make the first move, automatically lose interest in us when we take the initiative.




Ahh... the truths of life. Hahaha! :D

shoe dreams

i have to admit that i love looking at shoes. i would've written 'buying' instead but the truth is that i rarely buy shoes, especially heels. i think they look so pretty but i just don't know when i'd wear them...
today i thought i'd share with you just two pairs that have caught my eye recently.

MIU MIU MOCCASIN MARY JANES
   I came across these on the gary pepper vintage blog. They are simply amazing! Miu Miu have been consistently pumping out these all these gorgeously designed pumps!! MM shoes tend to have this patent shape to them that i think is so pretty! please buy them for me? :D

you can check them out here.

JEFFREY CAMPBELL LITAS

Rumi Lenora of fashiontoast.com

Nicole Warne of garypeppervintage.com

I saw these first on gary pepper then it popped up again on fashion toast. Since then, I've been seeing them pretty much every where on the net and now I want a pair! Apparently really comfy shoes. Hard to believe when you look at them. The posts I saw them on are here and here.

I hope everyone is having a lovely week! :)

xx.

why is naive considered cute?

Spillage time! Even though I THINK I've written about this before.

Okay. Question: why is 'naivety' considered cute? And why do people put on the naive act?

I mean, I can see how it'd be cute sometimes. I have a friend who used to be quite naive but it was okay because she was genuinely so. She wasn't TRYING to be naive and she didn't say silly things so that people would be like: 'AWWW...!' I think there's a massive difference.

I think as you get older there are fewer things you can get away with in that department. You just look stupid. I have another friend and guys tend to find her really cute because she's scared of action movies and has problems expressing emotions other than happiness. It's cute when you're, say, 14. And even that's pushing it. I don't know. Maybe I just feel like it's a complete act. I'm actually kind of glad that I don't see her that often anymore. Even back then I just always felt like asking her to grow up? There's nothing wrong with being positive all the time but when you're at the point where you just seem constantly in-genuine then you just seem... fake? I mean, you can be happy all the time without resorting to making yourself look like a 3 year old.

Maybe I just can't stand people like that. Fake-ness is not cool. Grow up.

p.s. sorry this is so vague. i can't name names or make it too obvious about who i'm talking about. ><"

another post soon! :)

xx.

what defines us

hi everyone!

i hope everyone is well. :)

today i just thought i'd throw together a quick post before i get crackin' on some studying. exams are freakishly close.

"There's more to life than love and being together."

This line comes from a Tegan and Sara song that I've lately become attached to called 'You Went Away'. Some people, especially at my age, are really hung up on the idea that have to be in a relationship. It's rather often that someone is in a relationship that clearly doesn't work but they stay anyway because they just can't imagine what it would be like to be independent again. I just can't understand why, if you're so unhappy with another person, what makes you want to stay? You're arguing every other day and giving each other the silent treatment. You call each other insulting names and sometimes you're even unfaithful. Why keep it going? It's logical to remove yourself from a relationship if it's not making you happy anymore. It's also logical to do so if you're just causing the other person pain because of your behaviour. But why do people not do this? Why do they condemn themselves to an age of misery and frustration when all the while it's in their power to get away from it all? You only live once and any time lost being unhappy is time truly lost.

A close friend of mine is in a rather interesting situation. I'm going to be completely honest and say she's been in complicated relationships before. Never has she acted in a way that I would've, which makes things very interesting for me as an observer. My advice is always listened to but never acted upon. This is fair enough. I don't claim to have any sort of experience in the area at all. I play the role of the neutral, un-biased third party that just watches from the sidelines. Anyway, this friend of mine is in an unusual situation. She's had a number of 'boyfriends' before. That what she says but I personally don't count relationships before the age of 17 because you really have no idea what you're really doing and it's not serious. Anyway, she started uni and made new friends like everyone else. She became particularly close to one girl who is a homosexual. Next thing I know, they're an item. I had a brief discussion with my friend about it and she said, 'I still like guys and if I wasn't with **** then I'd probably be with a guy right now.' I found this interesting and kind of amusing at the same time because the media was going crazy about LiLo and her girlfriend at the time. I've always been pretty open and okay with homosexuality so I was like, 'Oh okay then. Cool.' What else can you say as a friend? I was actually just happy that she was happy and I told her so. Over time, rifts began to occur between them. My friend would never talk to me about them until it got bad, which I understand. What fascinated me was that the same problem was happening over and over but my friend just decided to ground her feet and be miserable. It profoundly puzzles me as to why anyone would do this.

The other girl has been accused of being unfaithful and this just makes my friend upset and it happens again and again. They fight then don't talk to each other for x number of days and next thing you know they're back together? I'm not exactly saying that there is anything wrong with doing this but I just can't comprehend why you would go through something so energy consuming and frustrating and sleep depriving that has such a small chance of working out in the end to anyones happiness. I once heard someone in a sad relationship say, 'We're unhappy together but we'd be more unhappy apart.' Something doesn't sit right with that for me. So what, you doom yourself to eternal unhappiness?

I think people get caught up in the idea of love and relationships defining them as a person. This probably applies more to girls than to guys because, despite the development and progress of active feminism, girls are still expected to settle down and start a family. Without this, their lives are often said to have no meaning or point. There is always that fear of feeling unwanted, unloved and starved of affection that everyone else but you seem to receive from other people. No one wants to have that sad label of being a 'spinster.' But I just think that there is so much more to life and so many more components to an individual than just love and relationships.

I'm a strong believer in happiness, as most people are. I believe that it is just as important to be happy right now, in the present, as it is to be happy in ten, twenty years time. There is no point to suffering now to try to achieve a goal long-term that may not even make you happy. Despite saying this, I think it's important to still have challenges and goals in life but just don't get stuck in a situation that has no long-term perspective and that has you feeling sad and depressed all the time.

There are so many things that will ultimately define someone as an individual. We should not allow the pursuit of love and affection rule and direct our lives.

xx.

epic chocolate

my brother received this amazing box of chocolate as a gift. epic much?

xx.

Book Review : Never Let Me Go by Ishiguro Kazuo

I had high expectations of this book when I started reading it. It wasn't a book that I had heard of ages ago and had been wanting to read ever since. I heard of it purely by accident. My current obsession with British actress Carey Mulligan resulted in me coming across the trailer for the movie adaptation of this novel in which she plays one of the lead characters. The trailer intrigued me enough and it had splashed the words 'Time Magazine's Best Novel of the Decade' across the screen. I was soon determined to find this book.

I bought it only a few days afterwards. I was interstate and had left the book I was earlier reading, The Lord of the Rings, at home, so I began to read 'Never Let Me Go'. Next thing I knew, I was simply immersed in this morphed contemporary England that Kazuo had created. I would like to point out now that there may be spoilers ahead so please stop reading now if you don't want the story ruined for you.

The story is narrated by Kathy and is a collection of her memories from childhood, school and life afterwards. She was a student at Hailsham, a fictional boarding school. Or so it seems. When you start reading, you think that it is a fairly regular school. Then the narrator starts to mention things that seem slightly odd, even though she doesn't consider it so herself. For example, the children there spend most of their learning time focusing on creativity such as painting, poetry and sculpture. It takes only a short time to learn all the new terms used in this fictional world, such as 'donations', 'completion', 'sales' and 'gallery.' Underlying this school environment is the twist that ultimately defines it: the students are clones and have been raised only to later donate their organs when needed til they die.  It's so hard to explain how Kazuo has managed to turn this rather commonly used idea into something so brilliant. The story is not about these students wanting to run away from the school or their future, as some would expect. They seem to just accept their fate with little struggle or, at very least, they do not resort to drastic actions to try to change their fate.

It is such a difficult task to describe this book without wanting to write out the whole thing. I'm still not quite sure what it is exactly that makes me love this book so much. And there are few books that I claim to 'love.' Yes, it explores the fragility of life and human emotions. I think there's a particular emphasis on the natural need to feel loved and important. To some extent the book questions what defines us as humans. It is not one of those novels that come up with one-liners every now and again that make you stop reading to think about what has been written. It is more so that feeling amplified when you finish reading the entire thing. You realise you've gone on a very special journey and it makes you question a lot of things.

The characters are wonderfully drawn.  I felt like I really knew them inside-out by the time I finished reading. I started to feel extremely attached to them. Even now I feel that.

I read a few reviews before writing this one and many complained that Kathy was too emotionless, but wasn't that the point? I think that having a narrator that couldn't experience what she should've been feeling was a key part to novel. I felt like I was going through the emotions that she was missing. Throughout the whole thing, you do not really feel that Kathy is different from your average human being. Actually, you don't really feel that about any of the characters. But it's not till the last few pages that you truly see how 'unhuman' they are in terms of natural emotions. It definitely left a strange sort of hollow feeling inside me.

Overall, I definitely recommend this book. As I said earlier I'm not quite too sure why I like it so much but I really do. All I know is that I could write about it for days on end and still wouldn't be bored of doing so.  I have a feeling it's one of those books you'll either love to death or passionately dislike so take a chance and read it. I'm certainly glad I did. :)

xx.

first day tiredness.

hi everyone!

here's my long promised and late arriving entry! i've just been really busy lately. actually, it's because i've trying to cut down the amount of hours i spend wasting my life away in front of a computer. so, here i am, with an hour break to write for a while. this post is to purely update on what i've been upto.

it's the first day back after mid-sem break, 2 hours in and i'm already feeling exhausted. i learnt about selectively bred corn crops this morning. yes. that's right. corn.

i came back from newcastle on saturday night and booked tickets yesterday to go back up next week. my brother really has his hands full with the kids so everyone agreed for me to go stay with him for a few days.

i'm reading a wonderful book at the moment called 'Never Let Me Go' by Ishiguro Kazuo. it's really quite wonderful. i'll post a review of it here when i finish it. i'm trying not to read it so fast because i want it to last longer but alas, i find myself with only dozen or so pages left.

oh, i got my exam timetable this morning. i was so annoyed about it. i only have two exams this semester and they've gone and scheduled them two weeks apart. i don't want my exam period dragging out for a whole two weeks!! i basically have my first one on the first day of the exam period then my second a few days before the end of the exam period. i hate it when that happens.

i'm trying to get myself back into study mode. it's about a month till the end of semester. i'd say it's a good time to start seriously revising/studying/learning. i hope i can find enough will power to stick to it.

i thought i'd be awesome today and wear tights with my docs. my feet hurt. :(

anyway, i hope you're all well. i'll post again soon!

xx.

Come home, black sheep. Come home. - Black Sheep, Metric.  LOVE THIS SONG TO PIECES!

Déversement d'un Esprit Débordant

hello all!

i'm so sorry that i've been such a poor correspondent lately. i've just been caught up in a few things and still in newcastle. the weather has been amazing!

this is just a super super short entry to announce that the blog has undergone yet another minor change. it has been renamed 'Déversement d'un Esprit Débordant', which i believe is French for 'Spillage of an Overflowing Mind'. it just better suits what this page is all about. i hope you like it! the URL has changed to that as well. oh, and a reminder to feel free to comment on any posts. please no hateful comments though! i will read them all and reply. :)

but yes, terribly sorry for being such an awful blogger lately. i promise i'll get back to it very soon!

xx.